People have too much permission.  Self given permission.  Rather like men in the bathroom.  They have the same basic anatomical structure that women do, yet they think they have PERMISSION to be messy and/or long in the bathroom.  I understand, circumstances, blah blah.  It doesn’t take that long, or have to be that… splattery to get out.


Why…why..why…. do people think the “if I get __________ votes, my _________ will _________________.  Insert any number, and then words like drinking, puppy, dad, wife, mom, whatever!!! And the gross pics on FB?  No one needs to see a picture of a happy kitten, scroll down, and see some misshapen (that is spelled correctly) appendage or tumor of person in mid-surgery or whatever.  It is gross, and disturbing, and unsettling.

No one has permission to say things to hurt someone, or do things to embarrass someone or make them feel small or unimportant.  So. Quit thinking you have permission. I revoke your permission.

Everyone has a right to their own opinion, but not permission to shove it down someone else’s throat.

So… Nope.

I am enveloped in a welcome swath of alone

There are days, such as today, that I feel rather like an experiment. 

I no longer have to force myself out of my cocoon.  I no longer have to force myself to become socially interactive to break out of the silence that used to try to sneak unsuccessfully into my soul.

I can now, at my own welcome, let it in.  I can go for hours without speaking a word, seeing a person, or doing anything but listening to the quiet.  I can now avoid answering the phone, for I know that the person I ignore won’t be able to come to my door.  I can fake smile, and fake laugh, and not fear being found out.  It is freeing, beyond words.

I feel that I have life breaks.  The evening comes, or weekends, or school holidays, and the soul silence takes the back seat.  I enjoy the noises of my children, like a breath of sunshine.  I listen intently to their every tale, so that I may take them to heart, to replay when they are no longer here.

I can lose myself on a daily basis, to find myself just in time for the door to open.  I welcome the silence, I welcome the alone.  It isn’t even hard to adjust to, it is just what it is.

I wonder if it is depression, or “dampened spirits” or some such other glossy term.  I think, maybe I need medication, maybe <insert cure> would work.  I go for walks, I do my necessaries, I bask in the sun, and take the glow in.  No.  I am not depressed, I am not sad, I am not lonely.  I am just alone.  Quiet and content in my envelope of silence.

The time is ticking down, the days clicking away, and soon, I won’t have to answer the phone, won’t have to type responses, unless I really want to.  I know that today is a dark one, that tomorrow may be lighter.  Tomorrow may be a day that the silence takes a break.  Or the day after.  No matter which day it takes, the return is inevitable, and welcome.

Savoring the silence.



Hmmm… You would think it would be a bit easier, don’t you? You would think, that people have enough going on in their own lives. Relationships, money, jobs, and etc. You would think, that with ALL the good books, evocative music, captivating art, and natural beauty, that people would find something better to do than to worry about how other people are believing, or what they are believing in, what they are saying, what they are doing behind closed doors, and how they are spending their time and/or money.
I understand that there must be a small measure of concern for other people’s actions. If you find a pile of dead kittens in someone’s front yard, by all means, be curious. Maybe tell someone who can LEGALLY investigate it. Don’t go peeking through their windows, or rifling through their trash. On the other hand, perhaps if more people would mind their own business more, then other people wouldn’t find the need to kill kittens
It makes me sad, everyday, to go to any media site and see the hate and discrimination still happening, everywhere, all the time.
So. Mind your own business. When you hear someone “blah blahing” about someone else’s beliefs, or actions (unless they are utterly amazing or self harmful) walk away. Tell them to Shhh.
Unless it is WalMart people watching, cause no one should have to give that shit up. I give a thumbs up to the people wearing the outfits we all love to stare at. They have more self confidence than most people breathing.
So shush it up. Pick up a book. Go for a drive to admire the scenery. Turn up the radio.

Because slugs still make me giggle….

Because slugs still make me giggle....

Giant fluorescent pink slugs. Found in Australia, and due to some geographical miracle that took place eons and eons ago (17 million years), they managed to avoid extinction. Now, the amazing 8 inch long creatures are quite nifty and interesting, and deserve their due credit for being so fascinatingly odd. I stare at them in wonder, while also trying to avoid the fact that they remind me of what happens to a male dog’s boy bits when he gets too excited.
All of this is interesting, and would be enough of a mental image to last me for a few days of wonder…
There are even MORE NIFTY and INTERESTING and FASCINATING creatures on the same mountain!
The rangers said that on a good day, you can see hundreds of these huge, ridiculously pink slugs… which is kind of bad considering that there are also three species of Cannibal Snail on the same mountain.
Cannibal snails. They come across the slime trail of another snail, and then hunt them down, and then gobble them up. Snails. In my head I see them similar to pygmy cannibals… small with pointy spears and tribal gear. I know that isn’t possible, but I want more info on them before I file away that image as too improbable. Are they bigger than the pink snails? When they start eating them, do they envision pink carnival taffy and snort through their chewy sounds? Does it affect their bowel movements like brightly colored icing? Do snails have teeth? Are theirs pointy and menacing? Or are slugs so slimy they just ooze down? Rather sad since the only thing these slugs have done is to resemble pepto too closely.
This has to make you wonder about Mount Kaputar. If the normally little bitty harmless creatures grow to be giants and eat each other, what about the normally more aggressive creatures? Maybe they are more docile, like cuddly alligators, or pleasant porcupines….sweetly smelling skunks? Or it could have the opposite effect, and everything bigger is even more voracious. It is like a cross between Jurassic Park and Journey to the Center of the Earth. Makes you wonder if the rangers go around in survival gear and are heavily armed with artillery and tranquilizers.
My mind is happily flicking away with images of the rangers, slugs, and snails. Long pointy spears for all.

To be happy?

To be happy?

Everyone needs something different to be happy. At least that is what they think. All people have the same basic needs- obviously food, shelter, blah blah. What else? Happiness, of any sort. However short lived it may be, it is a need. What does every person have in common that they desperately have to have to be happy? Everyone likes to consider themselves slightly seperate from the next person in terms of their needs, or ridiculously similar. Both can be true.
I would say that everyone needs someone to love them, but I don’t actually believe that. I think that it is nice, but not an absolute necessity. When your immediate needs are met, what is one of the main things that contributes to the happiness need? I think… everyone needs sleep. I know you “physically” need it, but I am talking about the psychological need for “the sleep moment”
That moment can be different for everyone. It is a Need. Necessary for all. It can be the stretch while waking up. The cool side of the pillow flip. The fuzzy moment where nothing is in focus, and then you realize nothing has to be in focus because you can go back to sleep. That break from the daily grind of dailyness. That moment when you wake up, and feel like you have slept for 8 hours, and it has only been 2. Everyone has a moment they love about sleep, a moment that brings them a sense of peace, or happiness. Whether it is when you drift off, or when you wake up, or somewhere in between.
For those who have sleeping issues, and go long periods without those moments, the world can become dark, hard to navigate, difficult. Sometimes, you don’t even realize it has become that way. You get so used to it that when you finally get your sleep moment, afterwards it is like a rainbow has been spread across your world.
For those plagued by nightmares, the moment can be when you wake up, and another night has passed. The sleep you snatched between the shuddering wake ups being just enough to get you by. Your moments are fewer, and farther between. When they happen though, it is more like the world has been colored with a technicolor wand.
Sleeping issues can be varied. Some being on the more difficult side, with a medical backing. Some can be just simple insomnia due to stress, grief, loneliness, anything really that can delay your moment.
I raise my hand for the nightmare version. I appreciate my moments with an overwhelming clarity. I appreciate the joy that my technicolor rainbow brings, and do my best to spread it to others.
There are Many Many Things in life that bring happiness, but I believe that a sleep moment should be listed in the top 4 for everyone. Even if you consider yourself a chronically unhappy person, and embrace that completely, whether you realize it or not, I will bet you have a sleep moment. It may be that minute before you fall asleep, when you know that you are getting a respite from humanity. It is still a moment.
Embrace your moment, for I wish you as many as you can grasp.